The Joys of Being Single


I have been single for so long now that I am really starting to appreciate it; and here’s why:

1.  You don’t have to cook if you don’t want to.

2.  You don’t have to clean up after anyone or yourself for that matter.

3.  You don’t have to pretend to like ESPN or any other male-dominated channel.

4.  You don’t have to keep beer in the refrigerator.

5.  The toilet seat is always down.

6.  You don’t have to call and “check-in” with anyone.

7.  You don’t have to share your side of the bed or your pillows.

8.  You can stay on the phone with your girls or your Mom all night without anyone looking at you sideways.

9.  You can take trips with your girlfriends and not have to wonder “what he’s doing”.

10.  You don’t have to worry about anyone cheating on you.

11.  You don’t have to comb your hair or look cute or put on makeup if you don’t feel like it (or shower) T.M.I. huh? LOL!  (I’m going green that’s all just conserving the water).

12.  You just have so much liberty without having to explain yourself to anyone.

13.  You can sleep naked without worrying about someone randomly touching you.

14.  You can flirt with or dance with as many guys as you wish when you’re at a party.

15.  You can go on as many dates as you like with whomever you like and not have to pay.

16.  It’s really all about you!!

It’s not that I don’t still have the desire for a mate, it’s just that I’ve been re-focusing my energy on me and what I truly want out of life.  Being in a relationship with another person is no longer my TOP priority.  My relationship with myself is becoming the most important one.  If I don’t love me, or even like living with me, a mate will not make the situation better, only worse.  Seeing myself and my flaws and working on these things has been so rewarding for me at this time.  I am loving everything about me; even the things that I don’t like about me.  We must all know ourselves; love ourselves; and learn to live with ourselves before we can truly add to someone else’s life.  In a recent book I’m reading (Look Before You Love: Feng Shui Techniques that Reveal Anyone’s True Nature by Nancilee Wydra) the author states, “the journey will begin only when you are ready”.  If we are truly ready, we have to make room and do the work.  We want to be a balanced person and attract a balanced mate as well. 

The truth is the only place you can “look” for love is within.  You must first come face to face with all of your own issues before you are recognizable or “divinely” attractive to your mate; and before you will actually even recognize this special person.  Look in the mirror…you might actually see yourself “flaws and all”…and your mate will too.  This person will be just as ready for you as you are ready for you; and them!

There are many books out there on this same topic that mention some of my same reasons.  Let’s make being a single woman fun again!   



About Dr. Rae

Raechel “Dr. Rae” Rivers was born, raised, and currently resides in St. Louis, Missouri. She has enjoyed creative writing since childhood, but her love of writing grew even stronger during her college years. “Dr. Rae” prides herself on being able to convey such “real” messages about the journey of love. Her words, racy at times, are what some readers need to hear; would not otherwise say, and appreciate for truth and honesty about love-life situations. “Journey to Self: Journey to Love” is her first self-published book printed by Authorhouse. She completed an Ed.S., Educational Specialist degree, in Curriculum and Instruction at the University of Arkansas, Fayetteville in 2011; and is a world-renowned Writer, Entrepreneur, and Love Coach. Her life's mission involves encouraging women and young women of all ages to “work on you and love yourself just the way you are”. Raechel’s book, blog, and message on Self-Love have gained national and international popularity. As a result, she founded Embrace Enterprises and Publishing in 2012 to teach youth and adults about Self-Love and pursuing their purpose and passions. Her company’s motto is “Embrace You; A Lifestyle to Be You”. Additionally, Ms. Rivers also offers workshops on Writing, Publishing, Entrepreneurship, and one-on-one Love Coaching Sessions. She believes that “love is a journey where you go searching and ultimately find yourself”.

8 responses »

  1. I love this list! 🙂 I am so happy and proud of you. All of this growth and insight is such a beautiful process as I read your posts and witness the changes in you soul sister! You are such an inspiration in many ways. Sending energy of peace, love and abundant blessings to you!

    • Thank you so much my Soul Sistah! Love you and miss you! I actually just thought about you and log on here and see you here…aw…I remember when you had your transition…girl this is me getting ready for 30! LOL! 😉

  2. Girl you aint said nothing but a word. I love the focusing on self…now I do believe having a mate can help enhance…but when you put soemone else higher than you…its a problem. Great post!

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